Wednesday, October 15, 2008

The leaves have started to fall...

...and we got the pool cover on in time. With everything that is going on, I was worried about this. Leaf duty is my job, as Bill is so terribly allergic to leaves. I wonder how cool I'll look with my new hats and sporting a leaf blower?

I thought today as I sat outside that the leaves are falling off the trees, just like my hair is falling out of my head. A bizarre analogy, but a truthful one.

My hair has started falling out in earnest. It really came out on Monday when I had my hair rolled into a bun at the nape of my neck. I guess during the day when I was working outside that so many hairs broke that the entire back of my head became a mass of tangled hair. Steffie patiently worked the brush through my hair and we literally filled up the sink with it! We got the knots out. I was pretty much frantic over it because there was no way to even cut it out without completely butchering my hair.

Seems silly but there it is. I don't like not being "neat" if that makes sense.

So I had Bill cut another 5-6 inches off my hair to right above the knotting level. He's never cut anyone's hair before so I admit to being a tad nervous :)

My hair has not been at shoulder length since I was 16 years old.

I imagine I've lost close to half my hair now. It just kinda floats away from my head, just like the leaves and wafts down to the floor. If I run my hands through my hair, it comes out in handfuls of strands.

I'm not ready to shave my head yet but I imagine I will be soon. At least the awful burning feeling in my scalp has lessened.

I told my husband the other day that there isn't much that this breast cancer doesn't do to absolutely wreck a woman's femininity. Nothing is sacred, nothing is left untouched in this endless nightmare.

Steffie is calling these clumps of hair my "hairballs" and frankly, we have quite a giggle over it. I'm shedding more than our long-haired Ragdoll cat. It's totally acceptable though, because I'm the one running the vacuum.

1 comment:

Renee aka Goose said...


I shaved my hair last Saturday. It was traumatic, but I am so glad that I did it. I was told that all my hair would be gone on Day 15 and Day 16 on Taxotere and Cytoxan. Today is Day 15 and I have only a little spot missing. Hmmmm, maybe I could have waited until this weekend?

I found your blog by searing for Triple Negative Breast Cancer or "Taxotere/Cytoxan". Are you triple negative (ER-, PR-, Her-2 negative)?